I am a male 28 years old heterosexual, I have a phobia or I don’t know if it is defined as a phobia, I got scared & really disgusted when I see young girls (especially under puberty age) if they are warring makeup, what it that about?
thanks for your time
I wonder if
somewhere in yourself you feel attracted to young girls, and the
makeup accentuates their appeal.
Thanks for your answer, but can you please be more clear about the word "attracted" because it frighten me if you imply "sexually" because I have never ever felt that way, if you believe it could be some subconscious thing that i am not aware and i need therapy please advice. because i really do like kids boys & girls, and i am planning to get my own when i get marry soon and i prefer death than have such a disgusting feeling, if some how i do have it..
I really do appreciate your time answering my letter.
Well, at a distance
I cannot tell if this fear and disgust has a basis in sexual
attraction or not, but it might. However, there are other
possibilities too, so please do not start to worry unnecessarily. In
order to clear up and doubts, and to get some help with the problem,
I think it would help you to speak with a psychologist about this.
This is not something that I can do via email.
I wish you well,
Thank you very much for spending your time reading and answering my question, I sincerely appreciate your effort to help me.
I was already planning to visit a psychologist after I get married & have children to ask him about the my believe as an atheist & if I should not pass it to my kids when they ask about "god" since I observed that children tend to do that a lot in my community, and I guess it wouldn't hurt to bring up my fear subject too.
& thank you for your wish.
You are most welcome. I suggest that you speak with the psychologist before your marriage--the sooner the better. This will have many advantages for you, and no downside at all.
May you have a happy life,
Since our discussion yesterday I had most of the time thinking and analyzing my feeling of mix emotion (fear & disgust) of young girls wearing makeup, actually I tend to overanalyze everything which most of the time gives me pain but on the other hand helps me in a good way to understand things & to question anything & everything.
I reached the conclusion with a high probability of me have some sort of berried emotion of sexual excitation toward young girl, although I am sure I had no eructation not in the past “as an adult” nor in the presence. What really astonishes me is that I deeply despise people who had a thing for children! And I have not ever imagine that someday I could be one of them “on some level”
I thought about the possibility that maybe I also hate myself without being aware of that, as a reason for hating those people, but I am sure that I am not, in fact I really think that I love myself more than other people do.
I reached my conclusion based on analyzing the letter I wrote you yesterday; since this is the first time I discussed this feeling with anyone, the fact that I describe myself to you as a “heterosexual” in the first sentence of my letter reveals my deep problem, and in the second letter I notice me being over defensive to your proposal might be to deny myself to discover the true reason behind my fear, finally I think the whole thing is about my first girl friend she was 12 years old and I was 13 years old I still remember my extreme feeling toward her like it was yesterday & maybe I am still not over her yet and every girl in her age I see now remind me of her, so whenever I saw a girl in that age I get excited by remembering her “although I am truly not aware of that” so I feel fear & disgust to the idea of me being attracted to that range of age which represent my first girlfriend.
I wrote to you this letter as thanks for your effort to help me and I thought that I should share this information with you because it might add something to your experience to help other people.
I took your advice and I am going to visit a psychologist next week.
You are a most intelligent and honest man. Congratulations on your self-analysis which seems to be creating some openings towards self-understanding. You have done well. Please try to find a psychologist who will be able to hear you, see you, and understand you, so that you can go further with this. If the first one does not seem adequate, look for another. Sometimes it takes more than one attempt to find the right person for you, but a search will be more than worthwhile if it results in finding the right match.
As for your observation that, "maybe I also hate myself without being aware of that, as a reason for hating those people," this is what psychologists call "projection," and you might like to research that term on google to read a bit about it. It is completely normal; only very advanced self-observers are able to rid themselves of that particular defense mechanism (another psychological term you might like to google).
Thank you for keeping me informed.